I can tell stories of your coldness to me.

The neglect and distance …

Scorn for my love.

Not talking or sharing. . .

No common affection or gifts. . .

Cheating, many times. . .

Lack of participation in our life together.

Yet, you were the love of my life.

Why?

Was it the challenge of making you smile?

Knowing your childhood pain?

Understanding you deeply???

Learning every aspect of who you were?

All the loving behind closed doors?

I just don’t understand.

Maybe never will…

But you were, are, have always been, the love of my life.

Lonely without you…

But Lonely with you, too.

You started down this road with me,

The road of life,

Then somewhere got out of the vehicle and left me in it,

Driverless, but ever moving forward…

Relentlessly on this path,

Alone and clueless as to what would be next.

I grew, learned, adjusted, blossomed, even soared.

But ever in my heart somewhere deep inside

Missing the You I understood and craved,

And somehow loved.

Lyvonne Hill

April 12, 2021